Emotional Issues of Brachial Plexus Injuries

[kim lane]

I tried to search for the article 'Comfortable in their own skin" and can't find it.
Is there somewhere I am not seeing it?

Thank you!

Kim

[jmar]

click on the new posts link. i bumped it up for you. hope it is the right one.

[kim lane]

Thanks Jmar, got it

[meaghanalle]

hi there,

My name is Meaghan, i am 21 years old and i was born with a severe brachial plexus palsy. When i was born, my parents were told that there was a 90% chance that my arm would never grow, nor would it be able to movie it. My parents have told me the heartbreak they felt after hearing such harsh words, and as i get older, i feel more and more for what they went through. They were broken completely, my mom especially, as she told me she would have given her life for me just to live a happy life and be perfectly built like everyone else. Despite the doctor's opinion, my parents did not give up on me. My mom spent hours and hours throughout the first few years of my life stretching my arm and just praying and waiting for the slightest bit of movement. Until one day, my pinky moved! It was as if i had recovered completely by the way my mother was reacting; my mom saw it as a sign of hope and more miracles to come. As time went on, i gained more and more strength and range. Some years my parents said there was no sign of progress, but others, they saw drastic improvement. As i got older and began to understand my disability, my parents refused to feel sorry for me or treat me any differently then someone with two perfect arms. Funny you speak of the playground, because that was the first time ever i was reminded of my disability. I just loved the monkey bars and no matter how hard i tried, it just wasn't possible. Nor was cartwheels. With time though, i learned to do flips off them rather than swing from one to the other. Not only was this super fun but it stretched my arm out! Putting my hair up was very frustrating. I was in ballet at a young age, and i was embarrassed to ask my dad to put my hair up for me, and being out on the dance floor looking different than everyone else was emotionally difficult as well. I would come crying to my parents saying i couldn't do it and i will always remember my dad saying "don't say you can't meggy, say you can". Junior high is the absolute worst time, as kids that age are so mean and judgemental and you just want to fit in. Later i realized that it's even better to be different! I was also in piano and swimming, as my parents thought even if i didn't go anywhere with it, it would be good exercise for my arm. Swimming with one arm was a challenge..it wasn't fun swimming in circles for 3 years but i finally got it with a customized stroke and kick. Well with all the frustration and obstacles i was faced with, came success! With some improvisation and determination i can say now that i am a certified lifeguard and i also teach swimming lessons at children's hospital to children with BPI. Also, i have my grade 7 conservatory in piano and spent 8 years in ballet, tap and jaz. Yes, i looked very different doing all of these activities, sometimes i even looked a bit awkward and strange. To this day, i still get questioned every time i swim, play the piano or dance, as these activities make my disability a whole lot more noticeable. However, if i hadn't taken that leap of faith and went out of my comfort zone i could never say that i completed all of those things. And most of all, i found it fun and i was pretty good at it too! And if i can do these things, with a severe brachial plexus injury, your daughter can too! Your daughter with time will learn how to improvise and make the impossible, possible! Im sure she is already doing so, but as she becomes more aware of her full potential, she will achieve more with time! No one can help her figure out how to do things but her! She knows her body better than anyone else. She will also find ways of making her disability look less noticeable. For instance, as a young child i used to favour my arm and hold it up to my chest because it was comfortable and i was protecting it. I have learned to carry myself differently now and people hardly notice it. I have learned to rest my arm on something high up so i can straighten and put my hair up. Your daughter will learn too, i just know it. She will become less insecure about it, and learn to accept things just the way they are. I was so bitter at that age, but now i am almost glad i was given this tiny obstacle in my life. Your daughter will grow into a very strong woman. She will know what it is like to have things not come easy for her and so when she is presented with another obstacle, she will be determined enough to overcome it! I truly want your daughter to know that one day things will get much easier and that she can do anything, if she wants it enough. And as for stretching, all i can say that whatever you guys are doing, don't stop doing it! I did for years, and my arm got very stiff and weak. Stretch every day and try to use it as much as she can!

Good luck to you and your family!

[janalynn]

Thank you so much for your touching comments and words of encouragement. It really means a lot. You are an amazing person!!!

[Tmuthking]

Hi, my daughter just turned 14, and she had many of the same emotional issues, around the same age. And they are still there, to many degrees. But, one of the best things that she has done, was becoming an athlete, and more specifically a Paralympic athlete. Going to her first Paralympic swim meet, was a complete eye opener. Because there were athletes that had FAR less than she had in terms of function, number of limbs, etc. And these people became her friends. To them, she is a best case scenario. Not only was she opened up to amazing experiences, but her world was also not limited to just BPIs and "regular" kids.

The US Paralympic website is trying to encourage kids with disabilities to get involved with sports. There are so many foundations out there, where your daughter will feel different, but right at home at the same time.