Tips on getting around with one arm.

[cristinam]

Druxton:

Not to get involved, but I think she did sincerely mean thank you for pointing "the obvious" out. Once you mention it it, it is kind of obvious that one could ask a pharmacist. (I probably wouldnt have thought to do so, so thank you.) As she in other words says, we can try to be too independent and do need to be reminded there are people always there to help us... Which is why we are all here to help and learn from everyone.

please keep posting all your great ideas! Merry Christmas

[druxton]

I understand your wanting to back her with your support. Because that is what we all should do, support eachother. But when you start a sentence out with DUH!!! DRUXTON I'm guessing.......no not so nice. Help me out here, in her paragraph to me she refers to herself as an "OBPI-er". The person I was talking to on line was a person that had a motorcycle accident. Yet Carolyn refers to herself as an "OBPI-er". She says "We OBPI-Ers" as if you"re either Republican or democrat, OBPI or TBPI......I'm new to this site so maybe not up on the cliques here......is there a difference between an "OBPI-Er" as she calls herself and every so slightly separates herself apart from the others and a person such as my daughter and the gentleman that I was helping out????. See to me there is no difference. Eveyone with this injury is suffering and looking for help. Everyone with this injury has suffered and deserves compassion. Some of us are old hats so to say at this and some of us are newbies with this. I'm a newbie that just so happens to have 20 yrs of critical care/trauma behind me and pretty much knows the healthcare industry with all its good and bad. I came to this site because my daughter almost died on the street back in May and it's people like Carolyn, and I respectfully disagree with you (she is being sarcastic, re-read her posting to me), that would make me want to leave this site. She seems angry. Why all the sarcastic remarks when this gentleman was looking for help? Read his comment. He was thankful. Read Carolyns profile commment....there are no dumb questions.......Unless it comes from someone other then herself.

[jmar]

hey druxton, i appreciate your help. i really do. but ooops i am no gentleman. i am a lady. lol

[druxton]

I stand corrected JMar. Sorry couldn't tell from initials. I'm glad i could help you out.

[jmar]

thats o.k. please dont leave this site. you are a help to me and others. if you need help just post on here and someone will help you out.

[cristinam]

I would interpret it quite differently. But could see where you are coming from. This is the problem with things in writing without the verbals backing it up. I *THINK* the DUH was at herself like "DUH, Why didn't I think of that Druxton?" and the rest follows. But as Jmar said your advice is valuable and if you or your daughter have any questions, all of us on the boards both, obpi or tbpi will try to help where we can. And I wish your daughter (if I understood correctly she has the injury) the best of luck in her recovery process.

Now let's put what may be any misunderstandings aside and keep this thread up top with useful information as it has been for a while .

[AngelaW]

I read Carolyn's post before you posted your vigorous self-defense, and I felt (and still feel) that when she said "Duh". she was referring to herself Druxton and not to you. She is a very sweet, 72 year old lady and if you read any of her previous posts in any of the forums, she has always been supportive and nice. (And I don't know her personally at all so I'm not defending her as a friend. I just know her from her posts and saw her on chat once.) I am confidant she meant NO disrespect. At the time I felt she was applauding your contribution...........I actually just logged on to do the same as I found your suggestion extremely practical and safe. I was very deeply disappointed to find that the post that I began that was meant to be encouraging and optimistic has become very bitter sounding.
I am sorry your feelings were so badly hurt. Re-reading Carolyn's post I can see how it can be thought of as sarcastic (though i truly don't believe that was her intent.) If I had read it that way at first I would have felt just as angry (nobody likes to feel disrespected).........but I would have done one thing first, and that's ask Carolyn her true intent so as to confirm her sarcasm before shooting off a very public couple of angry messages. Answering perceived disrespect with anger and equal disrespect is also not the best way to handle a situation. Even if she was being sarcastic , replying by calling her obnoxious and dumb is not going to make the situation better, but instead intensify the situation.
OBPI'S (obstetrical brachial plexus injury) are those who were born with this injury, and TBPI'S are those who suffered from accidents (traumatic brachial plexus injury.) Mine is a tbpi, and like your daughter, I too almost died on the road. While there is a separate forum for the OBPI"s, it's not an elitist "us against them" scenario (I hope ) it's just a way for people to categorize themselves.
This is a very rich site with many ways to both help and be helped. I encourage you to not give up and am confident things can be worked out. There is a private message function that you can used. Why not give Carolyn a buzz and work things out personally and privately?
Once again it deeply saddens me that this post which I began and I guess feel very protective of has gone from being so positive to having a lot of negative comments. I want to try to help others as much as I can and I feel this post has been really fun and helpful up until now. Let's try to bring it back to the important stuff........sharing warmth and helpful ideas

Thank You,
Angela

[Carolyn J]

Dear Druxton,
I am sorry I've been "off the Boards" for a few days.
Druxton I did not mean to sound sarcastic, only helpful...I am age 72 and sometimes my wording comes out wrong.
Please accept my sincere apology. I never want to say something that would drive someone away from these wonderful message Boards. I feel aweful that this happened & I will be extra careful of my wording from now on.
Again, Please accept my apology. :

Carolyn J
LOBPI/72



--
"many things have tangled my feet, but nothing has held me fast." anon.

[Carolyn J]

Yes, Angela I meant "duh!" for myself. I never mean to critize anyone but myself.
I do feel Aweful
Carolyn J
LOBPI/72

[druxton]

Apology Accepted. It's been pointed out to me that I could have read your remarks wrong. So I'll stand corrected and move on.