Speaking of sitting on my pity potty...

[Natalee (Logan's Mom)]

I am having a rough moment. I have had so many wonderful people e-mail me personally about losing our lawsuit, first of all, THANK YOU friends. I have e-mailed several back, slowly over the weeks, it's been hard to rehash. I would like to talk to someone on the phone, person to person, voice to voice, who has lost a lawsuit. It has been really tough, really tough. I just got out of Logan's bed, looking at her and crying for what she has been through and that she has been cheated again. I feel like I have let her down twice. When I think of you guys on here that have won, I am sick with envy, jealousy, I am soooooo sorry to say that, I am not saying it in a mean, spiteful way, can you understand that? I think I really need to talk to someone personally that has personally gone through this. I just thought 100% that we would win, he did wrong. Please, to you that are going to harp to me that this isn't going to change things about her obpi or question me about suing, blow it up another smoke stack, I don't need that BS right now. It's not about the money number, it's about what should have been right for my daughter. I am not here to defend that I sued, I am glad I did, that decision was final. If I go to my grave tomorrow, I will know that I did try for Logan's sake. It would have been nice to have known there would have been no financial worries for Logan's medical future. Please, someone e-mail me, I will call long distance so the expense is mine. I know this might be a repetive post, but this is the help I am seeking right now, I will pull through this. Thank you so much.
Sincerely, Natalie

[francine]

Natalie,

I haven't gone through what you did so I am clueless. And I am only seeing a tiny glimpse of your pain through your post. I'm just so sorry this happened. I don't know how one gets over this kind of thing. If I lose my lawsuit I think I'm going to have to be in counseling for LONG time.

I wish you strength to continue on and whatever words will make you feel some ease at this time (even though I don't know what they are).

-francine

[marymom]

maybe a birth trauma counselor could be of help? There are others too sweetie, youre not alone -good for you for reaching out.

[Kwest]

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but even if you sue, win,lose or settle, you can still file a complaint against the Dr. with your state's medical board. This might be an option for you Natalee, if you haven't already done so.

[Ky's_mom]

Natalee,
I am sorry for the pain you are going through right now. I can not even pretend to know the hurt you are experencing right now. However I felt like I had to write to you and share with you that I will be praying for you and your daughter.
I can idenitfy with a lot of the angry you have with the the thought that your daughter should have been normal and perfect. Sometimes I look at Ky and feel the same way. You hang in there though and I will pray that you will find someone from this wonderful message board who you can talk to. If I can be of any help to you, please let me know. We did not sue ourselves, mainly because we didn't know we could when Ky was born in 1995 and also because we were totally ingnorant to the damage that had really really been done. And, I owuld like to add that my OB doctor, nor my peditrician nor Ky's theraphist, ever explained any of this to us or gave us a name for what was wrong with his arm. They only said that he had hurt his arm during his birth and that he would recover. I Never heard the name Brachial Plexus Injury until Ky was two and we started searching for answers to why he wasn't okay, like they had told us he was when he was released from Therapy.
Hang in there Natalee!
Tami

[Ky's_mom]

sorry for all the spelling mistakes in the last post...my son hit send before I check it over....there are tons...sorry!
Tam

[Carole]

My heart goes out to you. I have not been in your shoes I am still too afraid to figure out whether to sue. So you are a brave lady. I do remember a person who sued and lost who maybe moved out of the country and a friend posted her struggle as it was so painful anyone remember who it was maybe last winter? It was on the old boards Maybe someone can help hook you up with someone in your boat that would be so helpful. Prayers that you find peace and someone to help you.

[Kathleen]

Dear Natalie

I wish I had a magic wand to help you through this tough time. YOU DID NOT FAIL either time... in the delivery room or in the court room... The system fail you and Logan...

You will do well with Logan and she will always know that you did your best for her and always had her interests at heart...

The hard part is knowing that the doctor who did this will be in the position of feeling vindicated while everyone else knows what a fool he is...

If it is any consolation - when I first found the boards I went through a grieving process and that was when I looked at my birth certif. and saw the doctors name... I tried to get angry... could not... I wondered about him and how he slept at night after lying to my Mom... then finally I realized it made no difference - He is long gone and had to answer to his final judge... With this thought I realized that I did not need to be angry because he had to honestly face his maker and tell the truth...
That sounds silly but it gave me justice...

I will keep you in my prayers for healing & justice.
Kath

[Natalee (Logan's Mom)]

Thanks to you all for your support. I am miserable, struggling, but trying my hardest to find peace but not there yet. I want to throw myself down in a fit of rage. I get a ball in my throat and have to pinch myself to tell myself, "no, Nat, you didn't dream it, we lost". How can this be for my baby? Is there really no one else that's on this website that has lost, I really thought there was more. I could really use someone to talk to. Please...
Nat