what to do???

[staycee]

Has anyone come to this point where your child doesn't want to go to therapy anymore?? My son is only 4 and doesn't want to go to aquatic therapy anymore, he started screaming crying the other day when we wre getting ready saying my arms O.K , look I can do this and he would touch his nose,ear, pick it up and cried in the car begging me not to go til the point we got ther and he puked! He is doing good but this is important so what do I do , should I take some time off and then go back or force him and see if he gets over it??? I am tearing myself up over this because nothing has happened to turn him off like sometimes he does real good and sometimes he acts like he's 4 but I know nothing happened there so why??
Thanks in advance for any advise Stacy

[m&mmom]

If Matthew were to do something like that I would probably take a break and focus on lifestyle therapy. If he's fighting that much and getting himself that sick I would think that the threapy sessions are probably not that productive. Maybe he would just like to go to regular swimming lessons instead or try some other type of activity.
Hope this helps
Cindy

[francine]

Kids go through stages of wanting to and not wanting to do therapy. Sometimes the therapist gets old - the games get old - everything gets old - they get bored, etc. Give it a break. Do something else. Just go swimming - splashing in the water all on its own can be very therapeutic for the body AND mind. Do therapy stuff in the bath...there's so much that can be done. Don't call it therapy.

I guess the key is to acknowledge and respect where your child is at. When you can do that -then you will once again start getting great responses.

-francine

[njbirk]

Therapy is boring. It is less boring to me now as an adult because I am acutely interested in the outcome.

So we need to make it less boring and that can take lots of different forms. As was suggested a break in routine can help, doing something differently can help too. Changing therapists maybe?

I remember that my mother always made going to the therapist something I wanted to do because it was the only time I got to have fast food (and in the 50's and 60's fast food was really something new and modern). I can remember my favorite place was Red Barn chicken after therapy (now that does date me). So I guess she tried to make the therapy a treat.

I also remember the bribes not to chew on my hands. If I hadn't chewed on my fingers and the therapist confirmed it, then I got a quarter to spend at the dimestore after therapy. I'm sure the ante on that would be much higher today!

Nancy

[Carrie]

Staycee,
I hated therapy too. My mom would buy me a little toy or something every once in awhile, also, after doctors' visits we'd go somewhere interesting or fun, just her and me or my dad too. I have three sisters so sometimes that alone time was really nice.
The other part is that sometimes I would feel like my parents were trying to cure me and then I felt like I wanted to show them I could do anything, like maybe when your son said look I can do this and this hes trying to tell you that he doesn't think he needs more help, but hes only four and four year olds are pretty stubborn. Theres a stubborn side effect to these injuries, you've probably noticed. Maybe you could do something at the same time as you do therapy afterwards to make him look forward to the time so he can understand like ok, this is going to not be that fun, but we can do it and afterwards we get to go to the park and play. Good luck, remember you're a good mom, you'll figure it out!

Carrie

[Ashlie]

In my opinion, you have to ask yourself this: Who is the parent and who is the child? We also have a 4 year old and he tries to get his way but how will that shape him as a teenager/adult. In life you don't always get your way and you have to start teaching children young. Ashlie

[admin]

Wow Ashlie,
No offence but just because we're parents doesn't automatically make us right! Children are people too and they need to have their feelings taken into account or they are going to grow up feeling like they have no power. Kids I've known like that usually get their power in negative ways that the parent can't control, like eating disorders, etc...
I wish kids came with instructions on them but they don't so we try our best but I just think it is a mistake to say, I am the parent so, therefore, I am right. I know my parents were wrong about LOTS of things. I've had to forgive them for a ton of things they did VERY wrong.

[Lenni]

I have to agree with the general opionions here. My daughter Ashley, who is nearly 7, often goes through periods where she is into therapy or not. Each time we just try something new, and carry on. It is important to not focus on therapy all the time and have some fun. Trust me I know, Ashley has always set the tone for her therapy sessions and she has done nothing but steadily improve her arm. Her arm is not perfect and never will be but I respect her feelings about her arm. Also she is a lovely girl who minds her manners and has a great respect and empathy for all living things.

[Ashlie]

I did not say that parent were always right in their choices. What i said is that a kid, esp. a 4 year old should not be able to make a choice like that. You are the parent and you are giving him therapy for a reason. This is not like you are making him wear a red shirt when he wants to wear the blue one. This is his life your dealing with and in the long run he will be greatful for you making him treat his injury. Yes i follow my bible and live by it daily and i totally believe 'spare the rod spoil the child'. i dont beat my children but they do get spanked and they do know who is the parent and who is the child. If it is something simple ie. clothes, meals, etc yes i let them chose, i KNOW they have a mind of their own. but if it is a health and wellness issue I AM THE PARENT and i feel that it is the PARENTS responsibility to see that they are taken care of. If it is your choice to take a break from therapy, then thats your choice. We do therapy at home and see a therapist once a month. i dont think making your kid go to the doctor is going to make them have an eating disorder or be a serial killer. lol Thats like blaming it on the tv! You are a parent for guidance and to teach your kids right from wrong. I am sorry you had a rotten chilhood but mine was awesome and I am going to try my best to raise my kids with the exact same values that i had shown and taught to me. But hey, to each his own right? Ashlie